Oh, here is a thought provoking thing I did today; one of my friends sent me a video of wedding -- an Iraqi wedding. At first nothing really stuck out as odd, it was just a normal Middle Eastern wedding... then you see a little boy, maybe two years old. He is holding a handgun. It looks like he is trying maybe to give it back to his daddy (who is standing up over the boy), but he is looking at something else. Then somehow, the toddler shoots the gun!!! And it hits his dad in the chest, killing him! This was all caught on a cellphone camera. Wow. There was a watermark on the video with a web address so I typed that into my browser and suddenly I was at an all Arabic web page. Me not being able to read Arabic, I pushed the translate button and I found myself on a news site. And it was really fascinating to see the news headlines in that part of the world. I could read what makes their news stories, see what sort of things go on day to day over there. It was so full of tragic stories; suicides, accidental shootings, rape, murder, bombings... and there were also graphic photos to go along with them. Of course the news here in America sensors the images, however we still report on the crimes, though it seems we have fewer horrific stories. I just tried to imagine what it would be like if the news I am used to watching was as raw as the news on that site. What would my frame of mind be like? My children as well, since they also see the news? I usually turn the news on every morning as I nurse the baby and Joe and Lily are getting ready for school. They float in and out of my room, catching little bits of each story. But since the news here is quite tame (compared to what I saw on the Arabic site), I don't feel bad letting the kids hear or see the news. They should have some knowledge about the rest of the world. However, if there seems to be a troubling story about Iraq coming on, I'll turn the channel since their daddy is deployed. They don't need any help imagining what could go wrong...
But what if our news showed the real pictures???!!! Raw, unedited, and sanguinary??!!
I am not writing this to suggest we change our newscasts here in America and start to show every gory detail. Nor am I here to denounce the news stations in the world who do show the horror in technicolor. I suppose I am just marveling at the difference of each culture. Trying to imagine myself living there, seeing those images on the news. How would that affect my frame of mind, the choices I make for my family? The way I protect my children? I also know my husband and my brother are living in Iraq for a while. So that is their reality right now. They may not be living in the big cities, sharing the same streets and market places with the locals, but they do interact with them, they do experience the same things and at times they even may see those horrors. So I ask myself, What if it were me living there, can I imagine myself living there? I want to understand what it is like for my husband, and for my brother. For all my friends and family who are there right now.
I think it is so easy to dismiss the nature of what it is like in other places in the world, places that are politically unstable and therefore physically dangerous. I know I have done it, put the danger out of my mind when my husband has had to deploy. He has been gone several times and I think part of me threw a defense up to deal with the stress. I never forget that he is in a dangerous place, how can I? But each time he has had to go, I have made sure to keep those thoughts from occupying my mind. To not allow the images and fear to fill my thoughts with worry. Moreover, I have small children, I've had to shelter them somewhat from what it really is like over there. They know a lot now, but I still protect them as best I can from uncertainty and distress over their daddy. Perhaps I listened to my own sterilized versions of deployed life a little too often. I have not let myself "go there" too many times, if you know what I mean. Otherwise, if I did, I think I'd be constantly irritable and troubled, if I let myself recognize what I know to be true. It is a different and dangerous world that my husband and brother live in for now. It is not all sand and camel spiders, scorpions and MRE's. There are guns, bullets, and grenades, with humans who will use them against another. And then I remember it isn't just Soldiers and the extremists they fight living there. There are also families, mothers just like me. They too rock their babies to sleep at night, and make dinner for their families. They take joy in celebrating the simple wonders of each day. All the same, they have a darker cloud over their heads, and I wonder if they think about other cultures. About societies who have a more coated and modest newscast. What might those mothers think of the place I live?
And even as I write this blog, my husband has called me from Iraq, a welcome break from such serious thoughts above. We are able to talk about our kids, talk about what they need to feel better about daddy being gone. We think about gifts we are going to buy for them, all sorts of little things husbands and wives talk about all the time. We manage to cram all that in with each phone call, those calls that never seem to last long enough. Those phone calls are like appetizers, making you hungry for the full meal, but of course the next call isn't long enough either, so you never really seem to feel full.
I began this post with the notion to make it quick, just a note to say "I'm sick, tune in next week..." and now it seems I've written a brief commentary on "The News Style of America vs. the News Style of the Middle East" as well as "Dealing with Deployment Stress". Well, I didn't see that coming. If I'd known I would still be at this computer chair 2 hours later, I would have made a cup of tea. Tea sounds great now, I think I'll go start a cup steeping...
Anyone who has any thoughts to add, or shared experiences dealing with loved ones in dangerous places, please feel free to comment! Or if you have nothing to really add, but you just like to type, you can comment as well! Have fun! Go crazy!
:-)
No comments:
Post a Comment